it's been fine i guess not like a hostess club would change much because of that just kinda weird
[Knowing that she could very well lose an arm in the future, how is she supposed to explain it if it happens? Even if she's still friends with Majima with or without Retrospec, she doubts he'll understand blowing off work for months on end again. At least, that's what she should be worrying about honestly, but it's not where her mind's at.
No matter how she thinks about it, it was stupid of her to think she could rely on Majima throughout all of this. That she could rely on anyone. If Retrospec can be given as suddenly as it is, there's no reason it can't be taken away the same way. She didn't even realize how much she was trusting with him until he was suddenly gone, free from this stupid app, and now she can't anymore.
And she shouldn't have. People come and go all the time. This isn't any different. Just because it was easy to think she could count on him, just because it felt comfortable and safe. She was supposed to already know that you can't count on people to stick around.]
I suppose if he was only just your boss, that's what it would feel like.
[She still goes on dates with someone who doesn't remember having the app, sleeps beside her, pretends to ignore the weird things that happen around them whenever they're together. It shouldn't feel like it, but sometimes it's the loneliest Jasmine has ever been.
Of them all, she and Rose probably understand that loneliness the most.]
You knew each other before this; you'll probably know one another after. I don't think he'd turn his back on you just because he's become a sleeper again.
[It's not like anything Jasmine's said is wrong. She knows for a fact that it's all still true. No matter how weird it is, how lonely it is, Majima is still a friend at the end of the day. The years of history they have from before Retrospec even existed aren't just suddenly gone.
She just can't mention half of what happens in her life to him anymore. It's not like she dumped her problems on him often, but just knowing that she could, and knowing that she can't anymore. It's not the same.]
Let me know if it causes any trouble. We'll figure something out.
[Obviously, she thinks, she just means with employment or making ends meet. But that isn't it, really, at all. If Rose reached out to Majima more than she reached out to the rest of her sisters, then Jasmine knows she hasn't really anywhere to go now.]
i'll be fine work'll probably be the same old as always you don't need to worry about me
[If this really is Jasmine worrying about her. Sometimes it can be so hard to tell. But what else could it be if she's asking about her like this, right? Seeing her text was definitely a surprise.]
[And there, proof that Jasmine wouldn't. "Getting us even." The sky's blue, it's a day that ends in y, and Jasmine doesn't worry about her. Even if it hurts, sometimes it's easier to operate under the belief that Jasmine doesn't care about her.]
[She really doesn't know if it'll stay like that. Even if she hasn't remembered anything like it yet, Zero is hellbent on killing her sisters. It's frankly difficult to imagine her not achieving it, no matter how much she wishes otherwise. Having spent her whole life trying to take care of her family only to see something like that, well. They say "ignorance is bliss" for a reason.]
[They could have gone on living their lives like they had before,not heard or known or thought of any of this. They wouldn't have known any better, and Jasmine might have carried those feelings of hurt forever. Or she might have managed to bridge them; maybe, one day, she might have admitted she was wrong.]
If it were me who forgot, what do you think you would do?
[There's a long delay before her reply. It's hard to imagine what she would do simply because she doesn't want to know either. As much as she wants her sisters spared from this all, there's something almost terrifying to think of being alone in this too. Not that Jasmine forgetting would mean their other sisters would too, but she was the first. They got dragged into this together.
[Jasmine, too, kind of thought that it would always be them. Even if the other girls forgot--and Jasmine sometimes really wishes they would--she doesn't think there's any going back for her and Rose. They know something. They're in this together.]
[It's almost funny. Given what the memories have been like, this whole ordeal should've only driven them further apart. One hated Zero, she's sure of that much. Zero saw One as nothing but an obstacle, a hassle. With the wedge already driven so far between them, it would make sense for this to only make things worse.]
But in some ways, remembering all this, having to deal with all of this—she thinks it's actually brought them closer. They've had more civil conversations in the last few months than they had in years. Would it really be the same between them without all that?]
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I hope he finds happiness, then. Have things been all right at work even if that's happening?
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not like a hostess club would change much because of that
just kinda weird
[Knowing that she could very well lose an arm in the future, how is she supposed to explain it if it happens? Even if she's still friends with Majima with or without Retrospec, she doubts he'll understand blowing off work for months on end again. At least, that's what she should be worrying about honestly, but it's not where her mind's at.
No matter how she thinks about it, it was stupid of her to think she could rely on Majima throughout all of this. That she could rely on anyone. If Retrospec can be given as suddenly as it is, there's no reason it can't be taken away the same way. She didn't even realize how much she was trusting with him until he was suddenly gone, free from this stupid app, and now she can't anymore.
And she shouldn't have. People come and go all the time. This isn't any different. Just because it was easy to think she could count on him, just because it felt comfortable and safe. She was supposed to already know that you can't count on people to stick around.]
no subject
[She still goes on dates with someone who doesn't remember having the app, sleeps beside her, pretends to ignore the weird things that happen around them whenever they're together. It shouldn't feel like it, but sometimes it's the loneliest Jasmine has ever been.
Of them all, she and Rose probably understand that loneliness the most.]
You knew each other before this; you'll probably know one another after. I don't think he'd turn his back on you just because he's become a sleeper again.
no subject
[It's not like anything Jasmine's said is wrong. She knows for a fact that it's all still true. No matter how weird it is, how lonely it is, Majima is still a friend at the end of the day. The years of history they have from before Retrospec even existed aren't just suddenly gone.
She just can't mention half of what happens in her life to him anymore. It's not like she dumped her problems on him often, but just knowing that she could, and knowing that she can't anymore. It's not the same.]
no subject
Let me know if it causes any trouble. We'll figure something out.
[Obviously, she thinks, she just means with employment or making ends meet. But that isn't it, really, at all. If Rose reached out to Majima more than she reached out to the rest of her sisters, then Jasmine knows she hasn't really anywhere to go now.]
no subject
work'll probably be the same old as always
you don't need to worry about me
[If this really is Jasmine worrying about her. Sometimes it can be so hard to tell. But what else could it be if she's asking about her like this, right? Seeing her text was definitely a surprise.]
but thanks
no subject
Does it matter that much if I do?
I'm not worrying about you, just getting us even for those times you would have covered for me.
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i just didn't think you would
[And there, proof that Jasmine wouldn't. "Getting us even." The sky's blue, it's a day that ends in y, and Jasmine doesn't worry about her. Even if it hurts, sometimes it's easier to operate under the belief that Jasmine doesn't care about her.]
guess i owe you one now
no subject
But if you really feel that way, you can always pay me back some other time.
[The next message is delayed a bit.]
It'd be easy to be jealous of him for going back to his normal life. In the end, however, I think it's better not to be ignorant.
no subject
for now anyways
[She really doesn't know if it'll stay like that. Even if she hasn't remembered anything like it yet, Zero is hellbent on killing her sisters. It's frankly difficult to imagine her not achieving it, no matter how much she wishes otherwise. Having spent her whole life trying to take care of her family only to see something like that, well. They say "ignorance is bliss" for a reason.]
no subject
If it were me who forgot, what do you think you would do?
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That means something, she thinks.]
i don't know
probably something stupid
no subject
No you wouldn't.
I'd stop you before you could.
no subject
[It's almost funny. Given what the memories have been like, this whole ordeal should've only driven them further apart. One hated Zero, she's sure of that much. Zero saw One as nothing but an obstacle, a hassle. With the wedge already driven so far between them, it would make sense for this to only make things worse.]
But in some ways, remembering all this, having to deal with all of this—she thinks it's actually brought them closer. They've had more civil conversations in the last few months than they had in years. Would it really be the same between them without all that?]